Casting Internets

Check out these rad interpretations of Michael Myers and Freddy from Methane Studios. I've said it before and I'll say it again, if I could draw, this is the kind of stuff I would create. (via Super Punch)


There's gonna be a new Excitebike game from WiiWare called Excitebike: World Ralley. I haven't really gotten into the downloadable game fun and I rarely play my Wii, but the combination of this and the upcoming A Boy And His Blob might pull me right back in. (via /Gamer)

Topless Robot's 10 Most Embarrassingly Collectible Star Wars Toys of the '90s is both informative and sad. I was all over the Star Wars toys when they were coming out, but I don't think I ever paid more than whatever Target was charging. I've still got a nice collection in a shoebox in my closet.

/Film is telling me that Steve Carr, the guy who directed Paul Blart Mall Cop, will be directing the Short Circuit remake. I'm very curious to see how this movie turns out. I loved Short Circuit as a kid and remember watching Short Circuit 2 in the theater (there was a Nightmare On Elm Street title card that popped up and made my friend hide behind the seat in front of him). Not being one of these "How dare they remake my childhood movies!!!" people, I'm excited.
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This Is The Coolest Couch Ever

Anyone who knows me well, knows that I hate hyperbole. If you're saying something is the best or it's your favorite, then it should be that and every time you use those words, you diminish them. That's my grammar pet peeve of the day. That being said, this is absolutely the coolest couch ever. I saw a commercial for this thing called the Super Bob from Bob's Discount Furniture and just had to share it with the world.

Not only is it a full couch (or sofa as they call it on the website), which I appreciate considering I've been making due with a freakin' love seat for three years, but it sports dueling recliners and a fold-up middle console which offers up reading lights and a drink cooler! Also, it looks kind of like a Transformer, which I'm all for.

So here's what it looks like normally, kind of ugly, but it doesn't bother me.


Here's the recliners in action.


This is the top part of the middle section that flips back to offer up the lights.


And finally, here's the beverage holder.


There's also a loveseat with recliners and a center console.


And here's the center console.


You can pick up the loveseat for $699, the couch for $799 and both together for $1498. That seems like a helluva deal to me.

Anyone wanna buy me one?

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Wheelman Video Game Review

Let's get this out of the way right off the bat, Wheelman isn't a great game, but I liked it and I think that's because I haven't played any of the Grand Theft Auto games with any regularity. This is the game that Vin Diesel produced and starred in. I'll be honest, I completely skipped most of the story throughout the game, so I'm not going to comment on that. From what I gathered, Milo is an undercover dude trying to play the gangs in Barcelona against each other. You do that by stealing cars, racing around the city and shooting people. Much like Skate 2, you can teleport to anywhere on the map with a mission. You've got your main missions and then all these side missions. I wasn't having as much fun with the non-mission stuff (unlike Skate 2), so I only played a few of those and ended up sticking to the main missions.

This might sound obvious, but my favorite aspect of the game was the driving portion. Not only were the controls simple, but there were fun additions to the driving mechanics like the ability to leap out of your car, kick the driver out and take over, while driving. There's also a move where you can slow down and shoot at the attacking cars, or spin the car in a 180 and do the same. That was fun. As far as the actual missions go, they were fun, though sometimes ridiculously hard (or maybe I just suck). Oh, also, the game is friggin beautiful. I have no idea if it really looks like Barcelona or not, but it looked good. Heck, even Vin looked a lot like Vin.

So, let's get into the not so good stuff. Unlike the car stuff, the portions of the game where you're controlling Vin and shooting dudes sucks pretty bad. The aiming mechanic is clunky and the bad guys can take WAY too many hits before they die. Had there been more put into this aspect of the game, I think it would have turned out better. I did appreciate how, when you're facing other humans man-on-man, there wasn't an infinite number of them. I'm having to deal with that while playing Dark Sector, and it's annoying.

As I said, the missions can be pretty tough and nothing is more frustrating than completing two thirds of a mission, blowing up and then having to start over from the very beginning. It was a LONG process. It would have been nice to restart say, after you had already blown up two of the three cars you needed it ice. Also, whenever you're heading after a "boss car" his thugs are swarming after you in their souped up cars and guns. And, unlike their human counterparts, these cars seem to have an infinite supply. And, as if that weren't annoying enough, their cars are also always, ALWAYS better than whatever one you've stolen, even if it's one of their cars! That drove me crazy.

So, in the end, it's not a perfect game, but it might be worth a rent or maybe a $15 purchase used at Game Stop. Or maybe I should just pick up Grand Theft Auto. Right now I'm finishing up Dark Sector (or maybe deciding whether to actually keep playing it cause it's getting on my nerves), but I also just picked up Gears of War, Bioshock and Crackdown, which one should I start next?

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Halloween Scene: Castle "Vampire Weekend"

I'm a little surprised that the internet is still standing after tonight's episode of Castle called "Vampire Weekend." Not only did set pictures of star Nathan Fillion dressed as Mal from Firefly cause quite a stir last week (maybe two back), but there were also a series of Buffy and comic book references. I do have to say that I swear I've seen another procedural show like this with a very similar plot: a "vampire" gets killed, during the investigation we learn about that disease where people can't go out in the son (or that one where they love drinking blood thanks to their iron deficiency), and at some point we find out the victim worked on a comic or graphic novel that gives some clue to the crime. Maybe it was an episode of CSI, that's starting to sound right.

Anyway, I couldn't pay much attention to the beginning because I was on the phone with my folks, but Em filled me on after I hung up and made nachos. Overall, it was another good episode, though I did find myself confused and, being such a comic nerd, I called bullshit on a few things (that dude's art didn't look like Frank Miller and who uses ink for lettering anymore?), but it was fun. Too bad I missed most of the geek stuff. I was hoping that Kate would turn up at the final Halloween party wearing a costume referencing Buffy or Firefly (or maybe even Drive), but it was a no go. As of now the episode isn't up on Hulu yet, but it probably will be by tomorrow, so you should check it out.

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There's Gonna Be a Cocktail Musical!!!!

I say this with absolutely no irony, but I am crazy excited for the Cocktail musical I just read about on /Film. They don't share the affinity I do for the movie, which I could have sworn I talked about on the blog before, but my search is returning nothing more than brief praise. I love this movie and have since I was a kid. Well before I understood what happened to the Australian guy or why they had their falling out and Tom Cruise moved away, I loved all the drink flipping. In fact, I've always wanted to be a bartender and I'm pretty sure it's because of all the flipping. Love that stuff. This might be the first musical I drag Emily to. I've gone with her to see Dirty Rotten Scoundrels, The Producers and Mary Poppins. Meanwhile Evil Dead, High Fidelity and Toxic Avenger have come and gone since I moved out here. I will not let this one pass me by!

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Halloween Scene: The Funhouse (1981)

Blerg. I'm starting to understand why slasher movies got such a bad rap in the 80s. I knew nothing about Funhouse going in, not even that it was directed by Tobe Hooper, which I learned in the opening credits. I really only rented it because the title sounded cool. I still automatically think of Texas Chainsaw Massacre when I see his name, so I got a little more intrigued, and wondered how he's scary-up a carnival (which are already pretty scary considering they're filled with carnies). But the truth is that there isn't much to be scared of in Funhouse.

There's a lot of weirdness going on with this movie and I'm not talking about the carnival folk. You start off with a Psycho homage in the beginning with a girl who looks way too young to be topless in a movie, topless in a movie. We've all seen Psycho and our fair share of homages, so this was a pretty obvious fake. what was weird about it was the fact that it was a younger brother fake-stabbing his old sister in the shower. That's weird right? I don't have an older sister, but that seems like crossing a line into grossness, even for an adolescent horror fan. This starts a subplot that seems completely pointless as our final girl's little brother follows her to the carnival, gets scared, gets found and then a nice carnie calls his parents to pick him up. It has nothing to do with the main story and doesn't cross over into what's going on with his sister and her friends. It's a little disappointing because I like the idea of a kid alone against a threat, but like I said it goes nowhere. For more, hit the jump.

Which leads us to our final girl and her friends. I think she knows the blonde girl, her Rick Moranis-looking boyfriend and the final girl's date for the night Buzz. The two girls don't have much personality, Rick is a stoner douche and Buzz is a pretty nice guy. All in all, they're boring. And usually that's not a bad thing because the killings start pretty quickly and we're off in running. This time, it's slow going. Really freaking slow. They hang out in the carnival. Look at weird animals and a baby in the jar (do they ever say that's the big weird monster's brother? I assumed it was). Then they decide to spend the night by jumping off inside the funhouse.

At this point the movie finally gets started. The kids witness some craziness involving a bruiser wearing a Frankenstein masks (he turns out to be the gross thing on the poster), we find out that he has a history of killing people and the movie turns into your basic "we have to protect our family" plot you've seen dozens of times. Even then, it's still very slow. That's what happens when you've got four potential victims (five if you count the kid, but like I said, he's hardly in danger).

I also take issue with how freaking enormous the actual funhouse is. Not only is one level high enough to drop a rope around his neck and pull him up so high that the others couldn't even reach his feet, but there's also enough below it for a trap door to open and seriously injure someone and the final battle ground which shows all the gears and moving parts underneath the funhouse (which also seems to have 8-10 foot ceilings. I'm also not sure how they're looking down on events happening. Structurally it's confusing. Are they up a floor somehow? I kept asking myself these questions and, not being able to nail it down, kept getting distracted. Stories have to make sense, even on an architectural level!

If you're looking for a rad carnival movie, check out Freaks, Ghoulies 2 and the HBO series Carnivale, as Funhouse doesn't really take advantage of the setting, in fact, we only see two evil carnies. Where are all the other ones while all this craziness is going on in the funhouse? Blah. Next!
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The Expendables Trailer Is Awesome

I was pretty bummed out last week when I heard that the trailer for The Expendables had been leaked and taken down in the matter of a night. I'm not sure if this is still a leaked version or if it's official (let's hope official), but it looks like this movie will be everything I hoped it would be.

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Casting Internets

Check out this video from Maxim.com with all the best limb losses in movie history! Probably NSFW unless you work at the places that most of my friends do.

I'm not a huge fan of the A-Team, in fact, I don't know how many episodes I've ever actually seen, but, like most other children of my generation, I have an affinity for Mr. T. I also like Bradley Cooper and think this should be a fun action movie. The image looks cool at least. (via /Film)


Nearly every other blog has already linked to this Tauntaun cake that Great White Snark dug up. What can I say? We geeks like our Tauntauns and cake.


I haven't picked up Marvel Ultimate Alliance 2 yet, but I keep getting more and more excited as I see these new downloadable characters on Marvel.com. Cable's the latest addition and he looks to be wearing his modern duds. Hopefully, huge shoulder pads and pouches will be an extra skin.

In other news you've probably already heard, a dude in Iowa City, Iowa got punched in the face last night by a man accusing him of being a zombie. Twice. (via The Huffington Post)

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Halloween Scene: Terror Train (1980)

I'm back from Ben and Megan's wedding and it was great all around. Congrats to them! But, back to the Halloween Scene business. Before leaving for the wedding on Friday, Rickey came up Thursday night and we watched Terror Train. We also had several beers between us and, as usually happens, we got to talking quite a bit during the movie. I didn't mind too much, because the plot to Terror Train didn't seem all that complex (unless I missed something huge, which is very possible). Also, it's not one of those horror movies that I've heard about for years and haven't seen. I think I first heard about it was while reading one of the reviews over on Horror Movie A Day. If that makes me a bad horror fan, so be it.

The basic plot is actually very similar to that of Slaughter High with the picked-on kid coming back to have his vengeance on the people who pranked him (and others, by the looks of it). This time it's college kids and the revenge takes place during a costume party on a train which adds some claustrophobia to the story. We also get the killer wearing several different masks, starting with the one in the poster above and and making his way through those who picked on him.

I won't be going into the plot and details too too much, partly because I don't remember a lot of them and also because I'm trying to keep these short and sweet, but I liked the movie enough (for a great summation, check out Final Girl Stacie Ponder's TT post. I wasn't overwhelmed by it's awesomeness and I've discovered that Jamie Lee Curtis is not an actress I particularly like. She's fantastic in Halloween and Halloween II, but in this she just got on my nerves. That scared mousy routine works when you're supposed to be a high school student, but it's tired on a college senior.

Also, Rickey and I had an argument when the magician popped up on screen. He was like "That's David Copperfield." And I was all "No way." Of course, I was wrong and he was right. That got me talking about the time I saw him when I was a kid. Dude got sawed in half with a giant buzz saw and then jumped. When he jumped his top half went higher than his bottom half. Swear to God. Convos like this probably lead to why I don't remember much.

Actually, after reading Stacie's post I was reminded of how dumb the end was. After the reveal, we get a replay of the incident that made our nerdy weirdo go crazy in the beginning. Really? I get that he's crazy, but does he do twirlies every time he kisses a girl? Bleh. It just came off as kinda cheesy to me. Next up? Henry Portrait Of A Serial Killer, Jack Frost and Funhouse. Plus, the epic Weekend At Bernie's franchise. Get excited!

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Halloween Scene: Monster Poop

This weekend I will be attending the wedding of the Internet's Ben Morse and his lovely bride-to-be Megan (aka, Miss Martian and Kinsey), so I won't be able to wax poetic about horror movies. Instead, I'm bringing you Ghost Droppings and Dracula Droppings, two kinds of candy that are trying to sell themselves based on the idea that they are shit. Literally. I saw these at Adams and just had to take a picture. In reality they are Yogurt Peanuts and Cinnamon Balls (which sound gross). If you're like me and completely immature, this will give you a good little chuckle. Don't worry, I'll be back with a more substantial Halloween Scene posts on Sunday. I'll also be revealing parts of my awesome Halloween costume (I'll give you a hint, it's a superhero!).


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Six Movies I've Seen Recently

Even with all the Halloween Scene posts I've been doing this month, I still watch non blood and guys flicks, I just don't necessarily have the time or energy to do lengthy posts about all of them. So let's just jump right into it. Let's just assume there are SPOILERS in all these reviews.

SPECIAL (2006)
I remember hearing about this Michael Rapaport movie about a guy who gains superhero-like powers a while back and thinking it sounded interesting. I dig superhero movies, even when they're not about known characters and I like Rapaport. Movies like this can be an interesting take on elements of comics and superheros that norms might not have experienced before, but geeks like us have. Special does something like though. See, in Special, Rapaport is a comic book fan who takes part in a pharmaceutical study. He thinks it's giving him super powers, when really it's just messing with his mind. To be honest, I turned it off with about 20 minutes left because it was crazy-depressing. Rapaport is such a sad sack lunatic, that he's hard to watch. For a while you're not sure whether he really does have powers or not, but by the time I turned it off, after you're convinced he's just nuts, I'm not sure how things are supposed to make sense. For instance, when we see him in a chase scene, are we seeing the whole thing through his mind or not? Or the invisible fight? How did these work in real life? I don't often go in for the "comic book readers as a community" thing, but I do feel like this movie doesn't help paint comic book fans in any kind of positive light. Eh, moving on.

THE TV SET (2006)
After being disappointed with Special, I wanted to watch something I had heard good things about recently. When I was still at ToyFare, Justin, just told me he watched The TV Set and dug it. See, it's written and directed by Jake Kasdan who was a director and producer on Freaks & Geeks and is about a producer trying to get his show off the ground only to find his vision being trampled on at every turn thanks to TV executives. David Duchovny is the producer while Ripley (Sigourney Weaver) and Mr. Fantastic (Ioan Gruffudd) are the execs giving him trouble. There's even a brief appearance from Big Bang Theory's Simon Helberg (Howard). As a creative person who likes the idea of creating art and just letting it speak for itself, it was hard watching a man's vision get picked apart and seeing him try to fight for his ideas, but ultimately losing. But unlike with Special, the downer tone didn't bother me because it reads like a cautionary tale. Not necessarily one that says "don't get into TV because THIS can happen," but more along the lines of "hey, heads up, this friggin happens." The TV Set should be required viewing for anyone looking to get into the TV business and also is kind of a perfect meta bookend for Freaks & Geeks fans.

BREAKOUT (1975)
Sometimes I go through the Netflix Instant Watch movies and just look for a certain actor. One of those actors is Charles Bronson, because he's a badass. One of those movies is Breakout, which gives us the story of a woman trying to get her husband (Robert Duvall) out of a Mexican jail with the help of Bronson and his right hand man Randy Quaid. I'll be honest, I wasn't paying a ton of attention so I missed a lot of the intricacies of the plot. See, Bronson cons a bunch of people in order to pull off this prison break, with all kinds of twists and turns that I didn't get all of. I will say that Bronson is the man, no doubt about that and it was a lot of fun seeing such a young Quaid and I didn't even recognize Duvall as I've probably never seen a movie where he was this young. Anyway, you can do a lot worse when going through movies from the the 70s starring badass mothers.

FAME (1980)
As I've talked about before, I'm a big Kevin Smith fan and love listening to his Smodcast podcast. And, Smith is a big fan of Fame, having talking about it on several occasions. That combined with the new movie coming out and the fact that I've been hogging the Netflix DVDs with horror junk, I thought it'd be nice to put Fame at the top of the list so we could watching something on Tuesdays when you don't watch anything else. And man, what a weird movie this is. You've got the message of how hard the life of a performer can be (graduates as waiters instead of actors, photographers looking to take advantage of girls, alcohol) mixed with these over-the-top dance sequences that flow out into the streets of New York or completely take over a lunchroom. Now, I know that performing arts kids can be dramatic, I did musicals in high school and knew plenty of them in college too, but this is just nuts. Though, I do appreciate the fact that it's a practical musical, one in which the singing and dancing can practically take place in real life. In the end I liked the movie and was glad I had heard Smith talk about it so I wasn't so surprised by all the intense craziness so I was ready for it, but I did find it a little unfocused. I didn't have a grasp of who our main characters were until the fourth year and I feel like some of the characters were dropped as it did zoom in on our few main characters. Ah well, good stuff. I'm guessing the remake isn't as hardcore and the new version of the theme song sucks all the energy and life out of the original. Fail. Oh, also, Alan Parker, who directed Fame also directed Pink Floyd's The Wall, weird right?

AMERICA'S SWEETHEARTS (2001)
Remember how I said I hog the Netflix? I do, it's a fact. But anytime Em and I try going through NetBox to find something to watch, it takes FOREVER. It's not that our taste in movies is so wildly different, it's just that the movies on Instant Watch tend more towards my weird tastes than hers. So, when we came across America's Sweethearts starring John Cusack, Catherine Zeta-Jones, Julia Roberts and Billy Crystal. The idea is that John and Catherina are big time movie stars who break up and break down, essentially, but they still have a movie premiering that they need to do press for. Like The TV Set, Billy Crystal co-wrote the story based on his experiences in Hollywood, so it's another kind of insider look and seems to gel with things I've read. Crystal plays John's agent while Julia is Catherine's sister/assistant. It boils down to a romantic comedy, but it was a good enough one to pass some time. Plus, as you know, I love me some John Cusack.

SIDE OUT (1990)
Are there any other sports movies about volleyball? It seems like the people behind Bring It On and Stick It should be working on one right now, though stay away from Ultimate Frisbee, I've got something in the works (ie, I want to eventually make something). Anyway, I had heard about Side Out before somewhere, saw it was available on the NetBox and just decided the hell with it, I'm doing this thing! And, it was just okay. I'd still rather watch Bring It On or Stick It. The story follows C. Thomas Howell as a guy working for a bank or something (I can't even remember what the actual job is). He's serving papers to a rad beach dude and ends up playing volleyball with another guy. They get their asses kicked, then train and get pretty good, but the other guy gets hurt and the rad beach dude takes his spot. You've absolutely seen this kind of movie before, but this time you get Howell and Courtney Thorne-Smith and even Kathy Ireland for a few seconds. Good enough for a few beers and a watch, but I'm not counting the days till I watch it again.
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Halloween Scene: Student Bodies (1981)

After watching Slaughter High and linking to it on Facebook, my buddy Harmony from Toledo (we met while working at Barry's back in the dizzle) recommended I check out Student Bodies. Now, usually when someone suggests a cheesy-sounding horror movie from the 80s, you're in for some campy nonsense. I was pleasantly surprised to find out that Student Bodies isn't just another slasher flick, but actually a parody in the vein of Scary Movie, but, you know funny! Zing!!!

I really really liked Student Bodies (thanks Harmony!). Not only is it funny, but it also adeptly captures the feel and tropes of the slasher genre and only a year or two after it really kicked off. Actually, as opposed to comparing it to Scary Movie, it's like a slapsticky Scream. You get a rundown of the rules (the killer only kills people who have had or are just about to have sex). But, in addition to the characters being aware of the rules, we also get treated to on-screen clues like a body count and what not.

There's a scene early on when this girl and her boyfriend are in her product placement-filled house while her parents are out. The boyfriend hops in the showed and the girl is killed by what looks like a walking trash bag. After he's done, he jumps into bed with the corpse and says the amazing line "You're not responding to my maleness." His delivery is a bit awkward, which I'm going to guess was intentional to mock some of the crummy actors in other slasher flicks. After he gets killed, her parents come home and her mom keeps screaming at all these random things (dishes not done, food eaten, etc.) meanwhile her dad says "I hope she wasn't murdered in our bed." It had me rolling.

I highly recommend this movie for any horror fans, especially if you love 80s slasher movies. It nails all the beats and is over the top in a hilarious way. Good stuff. Also, there are scenes that will remind of Pulp Fiction, Home Alone, Wizard of Oz and Toxic Avenger.

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Casting Internets

First and foremost, go over to Topless Robot and check out my list of the 12 Weirdest Horror Movie Theme Songs!!!

Now that I'm done hyping myself, here's a couple cool things my friends are up to. Ben got a brand new Nova sketch of him standing triumphantly over Iron Man.


Also, head over to The Source to get a look at Titans/Power Girl/R.E.B.E.L.S. editor (and another former Wizardite and friend) Brian Cunningham to get a look at his office. I've always loved these insider looks ever since Wizard did One Of The Damned way back in the day. Check out this awesome DC calendar from 1986 he has on his wall!


Now onto people I'm not friends with. Why would you do this to your kid? (via Awkward Family Photos)


I wish I was friends with He-Man. Check out this Holy Taco guest column written be He-Man in defense of, well, He-Man.

Finally, this is amazing:

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Ad It Up: Kid Chameleon

I loved Kid Chameleon for the Sega Genesis. I remember stumbling upon it at my local video store, thinking the box looked cool (it is a kid hero with sunglasses and a ton of helmets) and renting it. I went on to rent it probably more than any other Sega game. I even remember trying to buy it used after the first Funcoland opened in Toledo and never came across one. Just look at how rad this ad is though. You've got an illustrated Corey Feldman-type in a leather jacket and the aforementioned sunglasses PLUS he's on a skateboard. All these things might seem passe now, but if I was reading comics back in 1992 when this ad was published in Brave And The Bold Green Arrow, The Questions & The Butcher #6, I would have been sold (like I was when I saw the much smaller game box). What made the game itself awesome was the myriad of helmets and hats you would come across that would give you special abilities and turn you into different characters (I remember a guy with a metal head--sort of like Ram Man-- and a samurai). With another favorite game of mine A Boy And His Blob recently getting a reboot, I have high (though unfounded) hopes that Kid Chameleon will join the ranks. With an imaginative design team and enough time to put out a killer product, a new KC game could offer up all kinds of play fun skewing into all kinds of different genres. Let me know if you need help with the story!

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Halloween Scene: Dexter Season 1 (2006)

I have a long history of being too cheap for premium cable. As a kid, the only pay channel we had was the Disney Channel. I remember relishing the days when HBO, Showtime or Cinemax would have those free weekends (I remember staying up REAL late one night to see Striptease and being pretty disappointed). In college we got HBO on our cable plan at some point and that was fun, but aside from that, the movie channels have not been a part of my life. So, I watch all the premium channel stuff (like Weeds, Sopranos and Big Love). Luckily, Showtime seems to be slowly making their original shows available on NetBox. And, being the horror junkie I've turned into this October, I just couldn't resist a 12-episode show about a serial killer killer.

Here's the basic premise of the show. Dexter is a blood splatter expert for the cops. I think he's part of the CSI team essentially, working in the same office as the cops. Is that how it actually works? I have no idea. Dex's sister is a cop who moves from vice to homicide, while a killer keeps murdering prostitutes, draining their blood and leaving their bodies chopped up for the cops to find. He's also playing games with Dexter. Why? Because Dexter is also a killer himself. See, his foster pops realizes the darkness inside of Dexter and trained him to only kill animals or people who needed killing, bad people. And Dexter, to this day, still follows the rules that Harry set in place. Harry, interestingly enough, is played by James Remar who was also in The Warriors and Band of the Hand.

Overall, I dug the first season of Dexter. There's a few characters that really got on my nerves and seemed fairly one-note. You've got Doakes, the detective who hates Dexter. The dude's kind of a meathead and if you take away an affair he has with a cop's wife, all he does is give Dexter shit. There's also Laguerta, a lady cop who's in charge of the precinct (or whatever it is), but keeps giving Dexter's sister Debra shit for no actual reason. With little else to them besides this "we're badass" vibe they have, these characters get to be pretty annoying and boring.

Aside from them, though, I found the rest of the characters really engaging. Dexter definitely has elements of Patrick Bateman, but not a complete nut. In the flashbacks we see Harry explaining the rules to Dexter and Dexter reflecting on the rules. He also talks about the urges he used to have. What I found a little curious is that we don't really get a sense of his urge to kill in the present day. Yes he kills a lot of people, but you don't get the sense that it's something he's drawn to do, just something he likes to do. Mayne that's something that gets addressed in later seasons. Speaking of the flashbacks though, Remar does kind of oversell the role, spreading on a bit to heavily while the writers also have him showing up every single time young Dexter about to lose control. It just comes off as a little too coincidental.

I mentioned Dexter's fellow serial killer who's playing with him, that's the overarching storyarch for the season and I found it to be a fascinating one even though I called the culprit before the reveal (though not WAY before). See, not only is this other killer playing a game with Dexter, but it's a game that opens up doors to Dexter's youth and we find out even more about him. It's a fascinating look at what it would take to create someone who is constantly offering a mask to the world and doesn't feel anything when he's not killing.

I also really liked the character of his foster sister Deb. She just seems so real and charming and it's rough watching what happens to her towards the end of the season. I'm also a big fan of the goofy forensic examiner Masuka who's awesomely lude and inappropriate. And Angel, another cop, balances things out by being just a rad dude.

The season finale was an intense one that not only brought an exciting end to the ongoing story, but also put Dexter in a reasonable amount of danger. It also changes the status quo a bit as Doakes is keeping an eye on Dexter after he shows up at several crime scenes unannounced. That should definitely put a damper on his extra curricular activities.

One other thing I want to note is how amazing the set designers make the blood look. You've got it spewing from people, on walls, carpets and even turned into art in Dexter's office. There's even a cool way that Dexter sets up something that looks like red straws to demonstrate how people were attacked and how their blood sprayed out. It's really interesting and gross stuff.

I can see how the show might get a little Weeds-ish where the writers just start wrapping sidestories up into nice little packages that are way too neat and air-tight, but I hope not. We shall see, I'm starting the second season tonight!

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Halloween Scene: Creature Features (2000)

Since I'm cutting it close to the midnight marker tonight and I don't think I'll have time to get full reviews of either Student Bodies or the first season of Dexter, which I finished today, I'm gonna have to finally talk about about my old reliable book Creature Features. I've mentioned the book probably a dozen or so times on the blog, but haven't really gotten into the nitty gritty details about it. After I had really gotten into horror movies, I was desperately looking for some kind list of what I should and shouldn't watch. I printed out a few lists from various websites, but it wasn't until 2000 when I came across the updated version of John Stanley's Creature Features that I had my new bible.

The book was probably out of date well before I ever bought it, but who cares? As I mentioned when it came to rock and roll, it already felt like I was way behind on everything horror even by the time I started watching, so it was all catch-up time. Instead of becoming my guide to "should I or shouldn't I watch this?" Creature Features has become equal parts checklist (I put a dot or an X next to every entry, dots mean I've watched most of the movie and Xs mean I tried and just couldn't get through it) and guide to my horror memory. It's hard to keep track of all the horror movies I've seen, especially considering my crappy memory, so keeping Creature Features around with its myriad of pencil dots and Xs take the place of my dying brain cells.


Even though the book is almost 10 years old at this point and Stanley has stated on his website that he won't be updating it, it's still my horror bible. I check it and read the entry for every horror movie I watch and will even watch an older horror movie over a newer one if I know I can cross it off in my book. I'm just a little weird that way I guess. I've even taken to writing the names of horror movies I've seen that aren't in the book on the front and now back covers for completest sake. I'm sure I've missed a ton, but I feel like I need to keep track somewhere (this blog is now the spot I guess).

I believe the book is still available on Amazon and in some bookstores and I highly recommend it even though, like I said, it's missing the last 9 years of horror movies. It's just good stuff.

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The Ruins Rundown

Bang-A-Rang! Unlike last week's The Ruins, this week's offered up both good, interesting challenges and all the drama you can handle. And it was all lady drama, which is SO much hotter than dude drama. You know you're in for a quality episode when the main challenge is over and you've still got a half hour left.

We started off with all kinds of drama surrounding Tonya and Katie, though it looks like they were taken from different nights and just edited together for effect. I do have to agree with Katie that a Thailand plunger in the bed is pretty friggin gross (also, that it sounds like a ridiculously creepy sex move).

I've got to say that also I agree with Wes on how ridiculous it is that Evan, Kenny and Johnny Bananas all feel insulted and concerned after SPOILER Tonya gets sent home even though they were the ones pushing her buttons more than anyone. I wonder if those dudes are completely amoral or unable to see how asshole-ish they are. Only time will tell.

Also, I've hated Sarah since her season on the Real World and I wouldn't mind Katie kicking her ass. More on that in a bit.

I'm getting way ahead of myself though. The main challenge was interesting. People had to swim out and put a bridge together one piece (and person) at a time. The Challengers were doing really well until Casey screwed it up. The girl's afraid of heights AND water? Just trick her into punching someone so you can have a chance Challengers. Needless to say, the Champions won.

Like I said, the challenge was over at the halfway mark which meant something big was gonna happen. That something big? Tonya getting drunk (after talking to some of the other contestants and telling them that she drinks too much in what was actually a fairly touching scene) and trying to start some trouble with Veronica. Do you not realize that Veronica is the one that went up against a friggin' witch on Road Rules Semester At Sea? [This isn't the witch scene, but you get the idea]

Anyway, Tonya was so worked up that she smacked Veronica in the head and got sent home for it, which brought about the outpouring of fake emotion from the guys that I mentioned before. Is this the guys potentially turning a new leaf? Heh, don't be silly. Here's a few choice quotes from their interaction before the slap was thrown. Veronica: "You look crazy." Tonya: "You do! You're wet!" [This is after Tonya spilled Veronica's food all over the place.] Veronica: "Are you half my age?" Tonya: "Not now." [After Tonya said she's half Veronica's age...or something, it's hard to keep track of a drunken argument when you're only buzzed.]

The deliberations for who would go in went pretty smoothly. Since the Champions won they got to choose and both Darrell and Katie offered themselves up. Darrell wanted to go up against Danny, one of the four remaining guys from the Challengers team, while Katie at first chose the useless Casey, but the team wasn't having that. They made the argument that Casey was the reason that their team won that challenge and they should keep her around, so Katie went with Sarah. I'm sure there's a ton of unintended game theory in there (I REALLY wish I would have taken that class in college).

The girls were up first in the Ruins and I was torn. See, I hate Sarah and I like Katie (she's a firecracker), but I don't want to see the Challengers loose another player. In the end, Sarah pulled it off. Sorry Katie (she said this is her last challenge because she's engaged and wants to have kids, but we've heard that one before). Then it was up to the guys. Like with the girls, we got down to a tied match, but Darrell pulled out the V for the Champions. Bummer. Now the Challengers are left with three men. I'm guessing that means they will always be on the chopping block every time when it comes to the Ruins. The Challengers team looks so small and paltry afterwards.

But none of this compares to the post-Ruins footage they show. You've got a group of girls talking outside about how Evan and Kenny run the show and use the girls as fodder to get to the end. THEN you've got Kenny explaining how the girls are useless in an interview. But none of that compares to a shot where you hear Evan talking and see a bunk bed with sheets and blankets put up so you can't see who's talking. You assume Evan's discussing strategy in there with a girl, but then we cut to inside the fort and it's Evan and Kenny lying in bed together talking strategy. Hey, I'm not judging, but it makes sense. Really though, I'd like to see someone really challenge those two (and Johnny Bananas) either from their own team or in the Ruins. See, I think Wes is in this game to the end. He's stronger than those guys and there isn't anyone on the Challengers who could take him out of the competition, but Evan, Kenny and Johnny? I'm not so sure about them. Have they gone in at all? I don't think so, but I'm not 100% (anyone remember?).

The commercial for the next episode was an interesting one. They show members from opposite teams all over each other. But in groups. So there's a group of Champions all around KellyAnne for example. Em thinks that that's because the challenge next week will be to physically bring someone from the other team over to your team, perhaps permanently. And, as she also put it, how crazy would it be if the Challengers grabbed one of the "Trinity" of dudes? Pretty friggin crazy right? I'm hoping she's right. Cause otherwise, the Challengers are screwed. Big time.

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Comic Book Commercials, It's About Friggin Time!

So, as you may or may not have heard already, Vertigo announced on their blog that they're running a commercial for their graphic novels Filthy Rich and Dark Entries on BBC America and dag-nabbit, it's about damn time. You can watch it here. Why don't comic companies advertise more? The only other time I remember seeing a commercial advertising comic books was back when Todd McFarlane would pop up, sitting in his weird, giant chair talking about how Spawn was the best selling comic of all time.

By placing ads in comics, you're preaching to the choir, but by actually telling the rest of the world, you're doing this thing called "expanding your audience." I'd say it's basic business, but I have no idea if that's an actual term because I've never studied business, but it's at least logical. Now, I know that commercials cost a ton of money (though they cost less if you have in-house designers put something together like this, Marvel does the same thing with their online commercials). All you have to do is tell normal people that the product is actually out there. I've actually had conversations with people after they saw movies like Spider-Man, X-Men and Batman Begins where they're astonished that comic books still come out. That was incredibly demoralizing. That would be like people not knowing movies or cartoons or books still came out. Gah!

I will concede, that, given these rough economic times, that it might not make the most sense to advertise on television. But here's an idea. Advertise during the movies. Not in the actual movies, that would be just too meta, but before or after. Throw some fairly recent covers up there and say something like "To check out the further adventures of Iron Man, go to your local comic shop!" or "Go to Marvel.com!" or "Subscribe here!" Just do something to let the general population know that comic books still exist and are still out there for popular consumption. We need the new readers you guys.

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So...THIS Happened

Naughty By Nature performed at the Big Apple Con. Lots of people were on stage. Hi-larious.

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Freddy Krueger & Hulk Together 4 Ever

Hey, wanna watch something really freaking weird? This video comes to the logical conclusion that Freddy Krueger and the Hulk are absolutely perfect for each other and sees them meeting, dating and hanging from clothesline. And hey, that's not the weirdest aspect of the whole thing. Just as Hulk and Freddy sit down to watch Freddy vs. Jason, Robocop bursts in with an intent to blast them, which ends when a bowl of popcorn lands on his head. And the only logical conclusion? Action figure dance party! It's like a much tamer version of Topless Robot's Fan Fiction Friday. Just watch the thing.

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Season Finale: Flipping Out

As I mentioned last week, I've been watching the hell out of some Bravo and my personal favorite show on there right now is Flipping Out. It's about an obsessive house flipper-turned-interior designer named Jeff and the people who can stand to work with him.

This season was particularly interesting because Jeff had to deal with the crappy economy (something he handled impressively well, I have to say), but also a string of crummy contractors and some troubles with his former business partner Ryan. See, in addition to not trusting Ryan, Jeff is also close with Ryan and his boyfriend's daughter Chloe.

I've seen various episodes from previous seasons (this is the third), but I think what I liked most about this season is the humanity that starts creeping through Jeff's uber-perfectionist shell. He speaks openly about how the economy has changed his business, but also about Chloe and his regrets when it comes to his past relationship with Ryan (they used to date). It's all very complicated and dramatic, but as I've discovered from being home for over a month now, you can easily catch up on any Bravo show at any time. This season's only 10 episodes long and they're only a half hour long, so it wouldn't be too hard to catch up. I also have to admit, perhaps ashamedly that I share Jeff's dark sense of humor, especially when he talks about accidentally spider bombing one of his clients (he couldn't stop laughing about it and neither could I). Or when he calls party magicians a ring of sex offenders. I lost my shit.

Also, I have to profess my love of Jenni, Jeff's long-suffering assistant. I don't know how this woman has put up with him for as long as she has, but you can tell that they're not just business associates, but friends. I also like how she's so willing to bust a move regardless of time or place. Oh, and she looks almost exactly like Julia Louis-Dreyfus, which is strange. She's an aspiring actress and here's an embarrassing video from her past I found on YouTube!

As it is, the season ends on a bit of cliffhanger with Jeff and Ryan's relationship still up in the air. We have no idea how they're interacting now, but the footage they showed in the commercial for the reunion special makes it look like things get pretty heated. We shall see!

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Halloween Scene: Frankencastle (2009)

I don't currently read Punisher and don't have much experience with Rick Remender comics, but I'm pretty excited for the upcoming Frankcastle storyline. Just look at these covers by Mike McKone (Tony Moore's doing interiors). The interview Remender did over at Marvel.com
doesn't really get into the plot of the book, but it looks fun. Punisher's one of those difficult characters to do in a shared superhero universe because, you know, he's all about killing people and in "reality" he'd kill as many supervillains as possible and probably get put down by one of the superheros also running around NYC. So, why not turn him into Frankenstein and put him with the Legion of Monsters? We'll see how it does.



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Halloween Scene: Disturbing Behavior (1998)

It seems like I've been watching a lot of high school horror movies. In addition to the recent reviews I've done on the Prom Night remake and Slaughter High, I've also a re-watched Dance of the Dead. And now I've added Disturbing Behavior to the list. I'll say right off that bat that DB doesn't hold a candle to The Faculty. The two movies share very similar plots with something strange happening to students and the adults in town/school seem to be in on it.

In Disturbing Behavior's case it's more Stepford Wives than Invasion of the Body Snatchers, with the students being altered and inducted into the Blue Ribbons with a chip. Overall it's a pretty by-the-numbers story like this. You've got the kid who's new in town, his friend from the fringes who turns into a goody goody, the crazy old guy who knows what's going on, an invention that will coincidentally effect the people with the chips and, duh, a victory in the end. The end is well paced and kind of fun, but you've probably seen this movie before.

The most fun was watching the cast. You've got Cyclops (James Marsden) and That Yellow Bastard (Nick Stahl, also of Carnivale, which was awesome), but the real draw at the time was Kaite Holmes. Have I mentioned that I went to grade school with Ms. Holmes? It's the truth. I think we were even in the same "family group" but who can remember? She was a few grades ahead of me. Everyone in Toledo was pretty excited when she landed the gig on Dawson's Creek. I even watched the first episode with my parents but got super embarrassed with the "walking the dog" talk and Pacey boning his teacher and thought the dialogue was way too crazy to be believed and didn't watch anymore of it (though I have watched some of Em's Season 1 DVDs and am impressed). Anyway, DB was also a pretty big deal because it was her first big, starring role in a movie. That being said, I don't actually remember if I saw it in high school or not. I think it might have been on at a party or something, but I didn't really remember anything that wasn't in the trailer (Katie dancing on the truck, that part where she smashes the guy in the face). I also remember loving Harvey Danger's "Flagpole Sitta" but borrowed the album from my buddy Randy and thinking it was weak. Maybe I'll download "Flagpole" on iTunes.

Anyway, if you're looking for a fun, late 90s movie starring a bunch of familiar faces that's also a great movie, I recommend checking out The Faculty. BUT, if you want to see Cyclops team up with and later fight That Yellow Bastard and a non-brainwashed Katie Holmes, this is the movie for you! Oh, also, in keeping with the high school horror theme, I'm watching Student Bodies thanks to a recommendation from my buddy from T-Town Harmony. I hope it doesn't suck!

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Halloween Scene: Friday the 13th Part VII The New Blood

I don't think there's a movie series out there that I have a harder time keeping track of than Friday the 13th. For whatever reason I always forget which is which. The one thing I do know (or at least think I know) is that I've never seen Friday the 13th Part VII: The New Blood before. The only reason I "know" this is because, aside from Jason Goes To Hell which I definitely haven't seen, this is the only movie not crossed off in my ragged copy of Creature Feature. Last Halloween I got a used copy of the box set that has F13 1-8 in them and reviewed 1 & 2 and 3 & 4 and even teased a review of 5 that never happened here. I'm pretty sure I also watched 6, but after watching the recap at the beginning of 7, I'm not quite sure. I can remember all kinds of comic book nonsense, why can't I keep track of a few (well almost a dozen) movies? Anyway, since I (probably) haven't seen this one before, I figured I'd give it the live blogging treatment. Hit the jump for the full experience!
F13 7

*This is the only numbered F13 I haven't seen before (I've also never seen Jason Goes To Hell)

*Interesting choice to open the movie with a voiceover recap. I'm actually kind of thankful because I don't really remember what happened in 6.

*Jeez, did I watch 6 all the way through? This seems kind of familiar, but not completely. I can never keep these things straight.

*The light-through-the mask holes and eye holes of the mask looks pretty rad. Kind of like that Korn video.

*This seems like a long-ass opening credit sequence, probably thanks to the recap.

*Hey, why didn't they just fill the lake in with cement? Just ignoring the problem isn't going to do anything.

*I like the idea of Jason being set up against someone with powers. If the world can create something like Jason, it should also create something that can offest him.

*Hey, never trust a doctor who thinks it's a good idea for you to return to the place your dad died...and a hundred kids have been murdered. MOVE ANYWHERE ELSE!

*Dr. Crews is an ass.

*Wouldn't someone have seen Jason chained up down there when they got her dad?

*Heh, it looks like Jason farts himself back to life.

*There's Jason's first kill. You can tell where there would have been more blood and gore had the MPAA not gone crazy on this movie.

*"The party hasn't even started yet and this place already looks like the closing of the stock exchange." WTF?

*It's got to be really scary to have a monster like Jason after you and not only doesn't anyone believe you (even though his murders should be well-documented by now), but also you're shrink is telling you you're crazy.

*Ha, Dr. Crews played the time traveling HG Wells on Lois & Clark! He was also in Side Out which I just watched yesterday. And he played Bernie in BOTH Weekend At Bernie's movies. I'm watching them next!

*It's also gotta be really friggin scary to be sitting naked in a tent only to get dragged out in your sleeping bag and smashed to death against a tree. Now I understand how funny that kill in Jason X is.

*I like the weirdo sci-fi kid.

*That was one of the most sluggish POV-camera-moving-to-avoid-the-hero's-gaze shots I've ever seen.

*Hey, they're both screwed up! Awwww.

*Yeah, smoke that weed! It won't have any negative effects.

*That blonde girl with the pearls is a bitch! Why would she make that straight-jacket joke? Oh, yeah, she wants the guy who likes Tina.

*Yes! Throw the TV at that jerkwad doctor! He sucks!

*Yeah! Nudity! Does butt count? Man, that preppy kid is a weenie. A dead weenie.

*Doesn't Jason hate the water? Why would he go in it to kill her?

*Jason's getting sloppy just leaving his victims around.

*It's good to see the mom defending Tina. Though stealing the car will probably sign her mom's death warrant.

*Jason does look awesomely creepy in this movie.

*I wonder if Jason goes into these things with a plan or if he just takes the victims as they come. It would seem rather impossible to plan for something like this, I bet it's like an episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm, he's got an outline, but not a script. "I definitely want to kill someone by the water and I want to use my awesome knife and I'm definitely going to strategically place the bodies, but aside from that, it's all jazz baby. Pure improvisation.

*Haha, what? Jason just killed that girl with a party horn. That's as weird as the corn kill from Sleepwalkers .

*"I have been rejected by some of the finest science fiction magazines in these United States!" - nerd kid. Hahaha

*There sure are a lot of knife kills in this flick. Jason looks like he wants cake as he goes to stab that kid near the refrigerator.

*I like that the nerd kid is just going through the presents. Aw man, he got a lame death. Thanks MPAA and you're lameness.

*Really? A cat scare? Come on now. Someone should do a cat scare montage like the dead cell phone one.

*This movie makes me want to watch Scream again, especially with its huge number of rule breakers: drugs, drinking, sex and "I'll be right backs." Thankfully it's on NetBox so I can watch it after I'm done with the Weekend At Bernie's movies.

*I like the idea of there being an intended surprise party that never happens. it's some cool set design and, in theory, could offer itself to some cool kills (not shoving a party horn into someone's face mind you).

*Woah, that's a cool sharp blade on the end of stick that Jason's got.

*Oh man, the doctor totally used Tina's mom as a human shield.

*The sci-fi kid's eye totally moves when they do his body-reveal.

*I just noticed that our male hero is wearing a Canadian tuxedo. So much denim.

*Haha, I love how Jason just keeps finding more and more awesome things to kill his victims with, with no explanation (or at least I missed the explanation). That thing looks like the weedwacker from hell.

*Jason's tying people up skills need some work. All that time under water has made him rusty.

*She's making a tree fight him? Ah, a tree and electricity.

*It's kind of funny to see Jason flinch away from the porch support posts as they break.

*Oh sweety, you've already electrocuted him and he got up. You think dropping a roof on him will kill him?

*The bitchy girl's about to get what's coming to her! With an axe even. BAM!

*This part feels really familiar. I wonder if I've seen it or I've seen these clips. Going To Pieces did spoil a lot of movies.

*Jason is one ugly mug.

*Why does she insist on just dropping him into holes? It's a house, you can't really fall that far.

*Setting the building on fire while you're still in it might not be the best plan of attack. Just saying.

*How did Jason sneak up on them? Movie BS, that's how!

*I was just thinking that it would be cool if her dad popped out of the water and pulled Jason under and then it happened!

*Haha, aw crap, I got myself all mixed up. I have seen F13 7, 6 is the one I haven't watched before! I should really consult my book before writing this stuff. Grr. Ah well, hope you liked this installment!

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Live Blogging The Big Bang Theory

*I have no idea which CCG they're playing. I'm with Penny "When does this get fun?"

*Sheldon's wearing a Greatest American Hero shirt.

*"It's true, I've seen him at the beach, he's like a human chicken wing." - Raj

*"Well, I imagine you've heard any number of things..." Sheldon

*"Wow, you really are a genius." - Penny. "Not really, I Googled how to do that." - Leonard.

*"The great thing about Ernie was that he never asked me for anything, he just gave." - Penny

*I've felt the same way Sheldon does about discovering something he didn't know was coming out. Sad.

*No surprise that Sheldon's a huge Wil Wheaton fan. Haha, now he's #6 on his enemy list either before or after Joel Schumacher of Batman & Robin infamy.

*I am nowhere near familiar enough with the Star Trek movies to get all these quotes.

*Now Sheldon's wearing a Superman shirt and Wheaton's got what looks like a Bender shirt.

*Raj got a wicked good burn in on those nerds about boning their moms.

*"SI-LENCE." - Sheldon

*"It's a joke." - Howard. "Are you sure?" - his date

*"Now fetch me Wil Wheaton!" - Sheldon

*Nope, it's not a Bender shirt, just a random robot I don't recognize.

*"My mother calls me every morning to see if I had a healthy bowel movement." - Howard

*"I couldn't ride a bicycle because my mom was worried that I would hit a bump and loose my virginity." - Howard's date

*Sheldon/Wil Wheaton throw down!

*"Your meemaw died? That's terrible." - Sheldon. I think Wil Wheaton's lying.

*Oh snap, I was right, Wheaton played Sheldon!

*"WHEATON!!!" - Sheldon. They had to do the Khan thing and it was awesome.
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Halloween Scene: "Treehouse of Horror XX" (2009)

I know a lot of people think The Simpsons is crap now, but I can't agree with that. I will say that I'm maybe not as interested in the show as I used to be. I have been watching this show since I was about six (feeling...so...old). Anyway, thanks to some overtime football, Amazing Race got bumped back an hour, so we watched the twentieth installment of Treehouse of Horror (which I always want to call Treehouse of Terror for some reason) and I had a great time!

From the opening with the Universal Monsters nod to the final segment with its weird/cool stage presentation I was laughing and having fun. The first one, called "Dial M for Murder or Press # to Return to Main Menu" combined a bunch of Alfred Hitchcock references of movies that I'm embarrassed to say I haven't seen. So, there were probably some spoilers in there, but what are you gonna do? The second one "Don't Have a Cow, Mankind" was right up my alley with it's zombie-ness and especially thanks to the 28 Days Later and 28 Weeks Later references. And finally "There's No Business Like Moe Business" was just super cool. The story was fun and funny, but it was really the presentation of it as a play that we got to see some of the background goings-on. Fun stuff. If you missed it, you can watch it right here:



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Casting Internets

It was quite the busy weekend, wasn't it? I missed out on Big Apple Con, which was a bummer, but it's hard to spend money at a show when you don't have any spare. Rickey did head down and I'm jealous of all the cool stuff he got and pics he took.

io9's rundown of the Marvel Animated movies matches up almost perfectly with my own opinions, though I haven't seen Next Avengers (I intend to) or the Wolverine portion of Hulk Vs. (it's sitting on my to-watch pile). Iron Man and Dr. Strange were just bad though.

This might be the coolest toy of all time. Head over to Sideshow for all the details on this Hot Toys 13.5-inch $200 behemoth. If either Sideshow or Hot Toys would like a review, I'd gladly do one :)



These MiniMates are pretty rad too. Toy News International showed off the Back To The Future Enchantment Under The Sea 2-pack and the third wave of Ghostbusters. I think this might be the first Mate to wield a guitar!




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Halloween Scene: "The Lonesome Place" (1948)

I'm reading through this book right now called Horror Times Ten from 1967. I got it while yard sailing with Em and her parents earlier this year along with two other horror anthologies like it and two Fletch books. I'll get to a review of the whole book when I'm done, but I wanted to comment on a story called "The Lonesome Place" by August Derleth. I'd never heard of Derleth before, but according to the intro before the story, he was a big deal when it came to preserving HP Lovecraft's works. He also wrote one hell of this story here.

"TLP" is about a man recalling a childhood fear of a place where he and his friend swear a big scaly monster lived. It's one of those tales where you don't really know if you can trust the narrator or whether the beast is real or not, but what got to me about the story isn't necessarily a shared memory with the narrator, but a familiarity with the feeling. I can't remember a specific place from my childhood that scared me, but I can relate to that level of youthful fear when you don't really know what you're dealing with and your imagination fills in the gaps. Hell, it still happens to me sometimes.

I especially like this passage and think it's something parents and adults should remember when dealing with scared kids:

What do grown-up people know about the things boys are afraid of...But what about what goes on in their minds when they have to come home alone at night through the lonesome places? What do they know about lonesome places where no light from the street corner ever comes? What do they know about a place and time when a boy is very small and very alone, and the night is as big as the town, and the darkness is the whole world? When grown-ups are big, old people who cannot understand anything, no matter how plain? A boy looks up and out, but he can't look very far when the trees bend down over and press close, when the sheds rear up along one side and the trees on the other, when the darkness lies like a cloud along the sidewalk and the arc-lights are far, far away. No wonder then that things grow in the darkness of lonesome places that way it grew in that dark place near the grain elevator. No wonder a boy runs like the wind until his heartbeats sound like a drum and push up to suffocate him.

I was kind of shocked when I realize that this story was from 1948 because it still reads so universally. I can't even think of a word that would have thrown me back over 60 years. That's definitely the mark of a great scary story in my mind. I was also reminded of a few of Stephen King's works that I've read. As usually, I'm not accusing King of stealing from Derleth, just wondering if King read him. Or maybe they just have a shared monster in their past.

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Halloween Scene: Ghost Rider/Captain America FEAR (1992)

I haven't talked about it much on the blog here, but I'm a huge fan of Ed Brubaker's run on Captain America. I think it's one of those runs that people will (and some already do) look back on with the same awe as Frank Miller's Daredevil or Chris Claremont and John Byrne's X-Men (but, unlike those runs, I actually like reading this one). Outside of Brubaker's Cap and his appearances in the Avengers, I don't have a lot of experience with the Sentinel of Liberty so I'm always look for new trades read. And, after just reading those first five issues of the 90s Ghost Rider, I'm now also looking for Ghost Rider books. So, when I saw a book on Sequential Swap called Ghost Rider/Captain America FEAR, I was sold. Well, as it turned out, it's not really a trade, it's a 48-page prestige format book with a fold-out cover (I wish Swap was a little more discerning in what they consider trades, but I also should have done a little research). When I opened the package, I thought it was actually a bonus comic thrown in for good measure along with Walking Dead Vol. 10 until I went back and realized I swapped for it. No big deal, just a cautionary tale to do your research.

Anyway, I had a good time reading this book. The story, written by Howard Mackie and drawn by Lee Weeks, teams Ghost Rider and Captain America up against an enhanced Scarecrow. The one and only interaction I've had with Marvel's Scarecrow is an appearance in DC Vs. Marvel when he appeared with the real Scarecrow, so I don't know what he was like before, but after a series of surgeries he now has enhanced strength and he makes anyone within 20 feet of him feel scared. It's a hormone thing. Oh, he also talks about his mommy a lot.

The story is pretty much a Ghost Rider one with Cap thrown in to make Ghost Rider feel like a hero and track down Scarecrow who's obsessed with him. You've probably seen the moment before when a young/new hero talks to Cap, Cap says he's doing a good job and they feel honored or vindicated. Well, Danny Ketch here has been Ghost Rider for roughly 25 issues (according to an editor's note, I miss those things) and he's feeling like everyone hates and is afraid of his alter ego (it's probably the flaming skull), but Cap doesn't judge him harshly. Cap says he's doing a good job by only going after bad guys and that being a hero isn't easy. Then they pretty easily go after Scarecrow and fight him and win.

I will admit, I'm still not clear on all of Ghost Riders abilities or how they work. I get that his bike can fly/jump/ride up walls, he's strong and pretty much every part of his jacket can be used as a weapon, but what I don't get is the Penance Stare. There's a moment where he tries to give Scarecrow the Stare but he can't because Scarecrow's brain is so screwed up. Shouldn't Hell trump craziness? I dunno, maybe it's explained somewhere.

It might sound like this is just a stretched-out single issue, but Mackie handles the 48 pages really well without much drag. It's like one of those rare annuals that is actually enjoyable and well-paced (I know you've got one or two in mind). And even though this is a Ghost Rider story mainly, it reminds me of how much fun Marvel's NYC must have been in the 90s. Both Captain America and Ghost Rider were hanging out, fighting bad guys and occasionally crossing paths. I would hope that the Ghost Rider issues after this helped Danny get a little bit more comfortable in his vengeance-seeking skin and that the weird Scarecrow ending came back somewhere. I probably won't be keeping this book in my collection but hope that when every comic book ever finally gets collected, this is included in it's correct chronological order with the rest of the Ghost Rider books. Those I would keep.

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Oh, DO go on.